You’re Not Lazy—You’re Exhausted from Carrying Unhealed Generations
- Dr. Deilen Michelle Villegas
- May 9
- 3 min read
Updated: May 12
By: Dr. Deilen Michelle Villegas, Ph.D.
Holistic Healer | Trauma Recovery Expert | Author of Reclaiming the Unspoken
If no one has told you lately: You’re not broken. You’re not weak. And you’re definitely not lazy. You’re exhausted—because you’re carrying what generations before you were never allowed to process.
You are the cycle breaker, the emotional translator, the one who chose healing instead of silence.
And that choice? That labor?
It’s heavy. It's holy. And it’s absolutely valid.
Generational Fatigue Is Real—And Deeply Underrated
In trauma-informed care, we often talk about fight, flight, and freeze. But for many BIPOC individuals and descendants of oppressed, displaced, and colonized peoples, there’s another layer of trauma that goes beyond the individual.
It’s called generational fatigue—a soul-deep exhaustion rooted in:
Constant emotional hypervigilance
Unprocessed ancestral grief
Cultural expectations to “stay strong”
Being the first to set boundaries or choose therapy
Carrying your family’s hopes while healing their hidden wounds
This is more than burnout. This is ancestral labor—and most of it goes unseen.
Why You Feel So Tired All the Time
You're not just tired from work.
You're tired from being the first to feel things others numbed.
From unlearning survival mode while still surviving.
From parenting yourself and maybe your children too. From choosing not to pass down what was passed down to you.
That kind of emotional and energetic fatigue isn’t solved with a nap.
It requires sacred restoration.
The Invisible Work of Cycle-Breakers
Let’s name what you’ve been doing:
✔️ Saying “no more” to generational dysfunction
✔️ Going to therapy when no one else in your family has
✔️ Teaching your kids about emotions, boundaries, or safety
✔️ Rebuilding your nervous system from trauma that wasn’t yours to begin with
✔️ Living a softer life your ancestors only dreamed of
This is real work. Spiritual work. World-shifting work.
And yes—it’s exhausting.
You Don’t Need to Push Through—You Need to Pause
Capitalism will tell you to work harder.
White supremacy will tell you to be stronger.
Your trauma may tell you to be perfect.
But your healing?
Your healing is asking you to rest radically.
What Radical Rest Looks Like for the Healing Generation
💧 Letting yourself cry without guilt
🛌 Sleeping without earning it
🔕 Turning off your phone without explanation
📿 Praying or meditating to connect, not perform
🍲 Nourishing your body with food that feeds your spirit
📚 Reading stories (like Reclaiming the Unspoken) that affirm your healing
You don’t need to justify your exhaustion.
You need to honor the weight of your role—and release what’s not yours to carry any longer.
Reflection Journal Prompts
What emotional burdens have I inherited that no longer serve me?
What does rest actually look like for my soul—not just my schedule?
Who told me I had to be strong all the time—and what if they were wrong?
What would it feel like to give myself permission to do less, and be more?
You Are the Dream and the Disruption
To all my fellow BIPOC healers, writers, mothers, leaders, and warriors:
You are the manifestation of your ancestors’ prayers—AND the revolution they never got to live.
Your rest is not laziness. It is reclamation.
Your softness is not weakness. It is wisdom.
Rest like your freedom depends on it—because it does.
Ready to Heal at the Root?
Dive deeper into generational healing, trauma recovery, and soul reclamation in my upcoming 4-book series:
Reclaiming the Unspoken – A memoir of truth, trauma, and transformation
Rebuilding the Unbroken – Rising from survival into legacy
Becoming Your Holistic Plug – Tools for mind-body-soul alignment
Awakened Science – Quantum physics meets ancestral wisdom
🌱 Join the email list to receive early access, excerpts, and exclusive resources → Dr.Deilen.Villegas@Gmail.com
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